User Profile

I'm a shy and apathetic person. I can be bubbly in some places, but school is not one of them. I tend to apologize a lot to teachers there for what I label as my own incompetence and crippling shyness. To my enemies, I'm rude sometimes. To my friends and those I tolerate, I'm what I would call joking. I have a twisted sense of humor. To strangers, I'm generally calm. To authority figures I'm apologetic, respectful, and fearful. The list goes on!

My mind, when not contemplating trivial things, is screaming as if it were an actress in a horror movie. It bellows like the villian, "Die! Die! Why won't you bastards die and leave me be?! Die!" though it means no one in particular.

If you leave me in mid-sentence, I have a habit of talking to myself. At the end of each one of my conversations with myself, I usually end with a confusing task leaving my lips. My brow furrows and a thoroughly-chewed thumb moves to my mouth to let my front teeth dent what's left of the fingernail and I mutter,"Problems...problems..." and continue thinking.

It's a weird habit that I have no intention of breaking. Like my constant perfectionism.

The only other thing I'm willing to tell is that I am deaf and have been since the age of 5, though the symptoms were clear before. It's genetic in my family, from my mother's side. She and all of her siblings and their children wear hearing aids. I do as well. They are a blessing. But I hate swimming, as they are not water-proof.

I have an extreme phobia of going completely deaf, which is why I sleep with my hearing aids in my ears, ready to turn on in the morning. I once lost one of mine and went completely ballistic. It was a time I cried in public, much to my dismay. The little children in the hayride started digging to find it, and I told them I appreciated the effort but was sure it was in the road. When my friend found it, I was extremely relieved. I owe him my life.

...Alright, too much information! *scampers away*

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